魔獸中...

非常好 再前進幾步...

all right,just a few more feet. And...

準備好 先生們 Elzebob大門到了

here we are,gentlemen,the gates of elzebob.

上帝啊

Good lord.

別慌 堅持97小時的戰(zhàn)斗就為了這一刻

Don't panic. This is what the last 97 hours have been about.

待著別動 一群裝備武器的地精

Stay frosty. There's a horde of armed goblins

正在門的另一邊 守衛(wèi)著艾辛諾斯之刃

on the other side of that gate guarding the sword of asaroth.

戰(zhàn)士們 拔出你們的武器 法師們 舉起你們的魔杖

Warriors,unsheathe your weapons. Magic wielders,raise your wands.

準備好了

Lock and load.

Raj 推開大門

Raj,blow the gates.

推開大門

Blowing the gates.

Control Shift...

Control,shift...

B!

B!

天啊 那么多地精!

oh,my god,so many goblins!

別傻站在那里 向前開路! 向前開路!

Don't just stand there,slash and move,slash and move!

保持陣形!

Stay in formation!

Leonard 有個敵人在你背后

Leonard,you got one on your tail.

沒事 我腦后長眼著呢 我會干掉他的

That's all right,my tail's prehensile- - I'll swat him off.

我打中他了 Leonard

I got him,leonard.

今晚我要用那地精的血來祭酒

Tonight I spice my mead with goblin blood.

Raj 不要 這是個陷阱! 他們在夾擊我們!

Raj,no,it's a trap! They're flanking us!

我被打中了!

He's got me!

Sheldon 他打中Raj了 快用你的催眠咒!

Sheldon,he's got raj. Use your sleep spell!

Sheldon Sheldon?

Sheldon... sheldon?

我拿到了艾辛諾斯之刃!

I've got the sword of asaroth!

別管劍了 Sheldon 快救Raj!

Forget the sword,sheldon,help raj!

我不再是Sheldon了

There is no more sheldon.

我是劍圣!

I am the sword master!

Leonard 當心!

Leonard,look out!

該死 我們快不行了!

Damn it,man,we're dying here!

再見了 土人們!

Good - bye,peasants!

那混蛋走了!

the bastard teleported!

他在ebay上出售那把艾辛諾斯之刃

He's selling the sword of asaroth on ebay.

你為了錢背叛我們? 你怎么這樣?

You betrayed us for money? Who are you?

我是暗夜精靈盜賊 你們沒有讀過角色介紹嗎?

I'm a rogue night elf. Don't you people read character descriptions?

等等! 有人點擊了"立即購買"

Wait,wait,wait! Somebody just clicked "buy it now.

我是劍圣!

" I am the sword master!

哦 我身上都是汗 誰想再進入游個泳?

Ooh,I'm all sweaty. Anybody want to log on to second life and go swimming?

我剛建了個虛擬游泳池

I just built a virtual pool.

不 我現(xiàn)在不想看見你或是你的獸身

No. I can't look at you or your avatar right now.

好像是隔壁的聲音

sounds like your neighbor's home.

失陪

Excuse me.

別忘了帶上你"無意"拿到的信件

Don't forget the mail you took accidentally on purpose

這樣你就有借口跟她說話了

so you'd have an excuse to talk to her.

噢 對 對

Oh,right,right,right,right.

偷竊信箱郵件 很老套的方法 我喜歡

Stealing snail mail- -

Penny 郵差又... 哦 抱歉

Penny,the mailman,did it again... he... oh,sorry.

嗨 Leonard 這是Doug

Um,oh,hi,leonard. This is doug.

Doug 這是我鄰居Leonard

Doug,this is my neighbor leonard.

有事嗎 老兄?

What's up,bro?

沒什么...

Not much...

老兄

bro.

一切還好吧?

Is everything okay?

是啊 我只是... 我又錯拿了你的信 給你

Yeah,no,I just... I got your mail again. Here.

謝謝 我得和郵差說說了

Thank you. I've got to talk to that mailman.

不 這主意不怎么好

Oh,no,that's probably not such a good idea.

人民公仆總是非常容易...動粗

You know,civil servants have a documented propensity to,you know,snap,so...

好吧 還是謝謝你

okay. Well,thank you again.

沒問題 再見

No problem. Bye.

哦 再見...老兄

Oh,and bye... bro.

呆呆地在想什么呢?

Penny for your thoughts.

怎么回事?

What's the matter?

我很好 Penny也很好

I'm fine. Penny's fine.

和她接吻的家伙也很好

The guy she's kissing is really fine.

接吻 哪一種? 臉頰? 嘴唇? 情人? 朋友?

Kissing,what kind of kissing? Cheeks?

你什么毛病啊?

What is wrong with you?

我是個浪漫主義者

I'm a romantic.

別告訴我你不可救藥的迷戀 發(fā)展成了無意義的嫉妒

Please don't tell me that your hopeless infatuation is devolving into pointless jealousy.

我不是嫉妒 只是有點擔心她

I'm not jealous. I'm just a little concerned for her.

我不怎么喜歡那家伙的長相

I didn't like the look of the guy that she was with.

因為他長得比你帥氣?

Because he looks better than you?

是啊

Yeah.

可以說是夢幻般的外形

He was kind of dreamy.

只是你現(xiàn)在還能從燃燒的廢墟里

Well,at least now you can retrieve the black box from the twisted,

找回裝滿對她美妙幻想的黑匣子

olsmdering wreckage that was once your fantasy of dating her

好好分析下數(shù)據(jù) 你就不會再墜入"呆子谷"

and analyze the data so that you don't crash into geek mountain.

我反對 愛情不是短跑 而是馬拉松

I di. Greesa love is not a sprint,it's a marathon- -

永不放棄的追逐 直到她最終投入你的懷抱

a relentless pursuit that only ends when she falls into your arms...

或是用防狼噴霧劑噴你

or hits you with the pepper spray.

不 我和Penny結束了

No,I'm done with penny.

我要更現(xiàn)實些 去追求合我拍的人

I'm going to be more realistic and go after someone my own speed.

比如誰?

Like who?

不知道... Olivia Geiger

I don't know... olivia geiger.

自助餐廳里那個有點跛 還有弱視的營養(yǎng)學家?

The dietician at the cafeteria with the limp and the lazy eye?

是的

Yeah.

哦 我看你沒戲

Oh,I don't think you have a shot there.

我注意到Leslie Winkle 最近在刮她的腿毛

I have noticed that leslie winkle recently started shaving her legs.

既然冬天都已經(jīng)到了

Now given that winter is coming,

只能說明她是在暗示 她可以作為做愛對象

one can only assume she's signaling sexual availability.

我不清楚 你們在同一個實驗室

I don't know. You guys work in the same lab.

所以呢?

So?

這有隱患 相信我 我清楚

There are pitfalls. Trust me,I know.

說到性騷擾的相關法律 我可是自學而成的專家

When it comes to sexual harassment law,I'm a bit of a self taught expert.

Howard 如果我要約Leslie Winkle出去 也只是吃頓飯

Look,howard,if I were to ask leslie winkle out,it would just be for dinner.

我不會去實驗室 要她為我跳脫衣舞

I'm not going to walk into the lab,ask her to strip naked and dance for me.

哦 那你就沒事了

Oh,then you're probably okay.

嗨 Leslie

Hello,leslie.

嗨 Leonard

Hi,leonard.

Leslie 我建議做個實驗...

Leslie,I would like to propose an experiment...

- 戴上眼鏡 Leonard - 好吧

- goggles,leonard. - Right.

Leslie 我建議做個實驗

Leslie,I would like p toropose an experiment.

等一下

Hang on.

我想試試一個500千瓦氧碘激光器

I'm trying to see how long it takes a 500 - kilowatt oxygen iodine laser

得花多久把我的杯裝泡面加熱

to heat up my cup a' noodles.

我試過 大概2秒 蔬菜湯花2.6秒

I've done it. About two seconds. 2. 6 for minestrone.

總之 我在考慮來個生物學的社交探索 結合神經(jīng)化學方面的專家知識

anyway,I was thinking more of a bio- social exploration with a neuro- chemical overlay.

等等 你約我出去?

Wait,are you asking me out?

我認為是改變我們 同事/友誼關系的范例

I was going to characterize it as the modification of our colleague- slash- friendship paradigm

外加個約會作為補充成分

with the addition of a date like component,

但我們不需要一直說術語

but we don't need to quibble over terminology.

你計劃做怎樣的實驗?

What sort of experiment would you propose?

這個領域有種普遍接受的模式

There's a generally accepted pattern in this area.

我去接你 帶你去餐廳

I would pick you up,take you to a restaurant.

接著我們可以看場電影

Then we would see a movie,

也許一部休·格蘭特或桑德拉·布洛克 天才演繹的浪漫輕喜劇

probably a romantic comedy featuring the talents of hugh grant or sandra bullock.

有意思

Interesting.

你是否同意 我們評價約會成敗的依據(jù)

And would you agree that the primary way we would evaluate

是基于離別之吻時的化學反應?

either the success or failure of the date would be based

on the biochemical reaction during the good night kiss?

心跳率 生化信息素等等 的確

Heart rate,pheromones,etc. Yes.

我們干嘛不假定約會很順利 直接進行關鍵的有變數(shù)的部分?

Why don't we just stipulate that the date goes well and move to the key variable?

你意思是現(xiàn)在就吻你?

You mean kiss you now?

是的

Yes.

你怎么定義吻的參數(shù)嗎?

Can you define the parameters of the kiss?

嘴唇的親密度還有浪漫度 要薄荷嗎?

Close - mouthed but romantic. Mint?

謝謝

Thank you.

我數(shù)三下?

shall I count down from three?

不 我覺得應該自然點

No,I think it needs to be spontaneous.

感覺怎么樣?

What do you think?

你提出的實驗方案 該由你先說說實驗的發(fā)現(xiàn)

You proposed the experiment. I think you should present your findings first.

很公平

Fair enough.

從正面講 這個吻很不錯

On the plus side,it was a good kiss.

合理的技術 沒有多余的唾沫

Reasonable technique,no extraneous spittle.

另一方面講 沒什么感覺

On the other hand,no arousal.

- 沒感覺? - 沒有

- None? - None.

呃 很感謝你抽出時間

Well,thank you for your time.

謝謝你

Thanyok U.

一點感覺都沒?

None at all?

Sheldon 如果你是機器人 我知道但你自己不知道...

Sheldon,if you were a robot,and I knew and you didn'T... ...

你希望我告訴你嗎?

would you want me to tell you?

看情況

That depends.

當我得知我是機器人...

When I learn that I'm a robot...

我有能力承受嗎?

will I be able to handle it?

也許吧 雖然歷來的科幻小說 都不能茍同這點

Maybe- - although the history of science fiction is not on your side.

好吧 我來問你

Okay,uh,let me ask you this- -

當我得知我是機器人

when I learn that I'm a robot,

我要受限于阿西莫夫的"機器人三定律"嗎?

would I be bound by asimov's three laws of robotics?

你可能現(xiàn)在就受限哦

You might be bound by them right now.

就是啊

That's true.

你傷害過人類嗎?

Have you ever harmed a human being

或任人受傷而袖手旁觀?

or through inaction allowed a human being to come to harm?

當然沒有

Of course not.

除非在他人危險的情況下 你會傷害自己

Have you ever harmed yourself or allowed yourself to be harmed except in cases

或容忍自己被傷害嗎?

where a human being would have been endangered?

呃 沒有

Well,no.

我聞到機器人的味道了

I smell robot.

嘿 過得怎么樣?

Hey,what's going on?

互聯(lián)網(wǎng)癱瘓半個小時了

Internet's been down for half an hour.

還有 Sheldon可能是機器人

Also,sheldon may be a robot.

和Leslie怎么樣啦?

So how'd it go with leslie?

哦 我們試著接吻 但地球沒轉

Oh,we tried kissing,but the earth didn't move.

我是說 比地球原來轉的383英里要更多

I mean,any more than the 383 miles that it was going to move anyway.

哦 我以前看過他這表情

Oh,I've seen that look before.

未來兩周 他將不停地拖地

This is just going to be two weeks of moping

哼唱乏味的情感和歌曲

and tedious emo songs

要我下去寵物商店看貓

and calling me to come down to pet stores to look at cats.

我不知道撐不撐得住

I don't know if I can take it.

你可以關掉自己的電源

You could power down.

一如既往 Wolowitz會有解決辦法的

Well,as usual,wolowitz has the solution.

我碰巧知道個好地方 有很多符合條件的女士

I happen to know a place where there are plenty of eligible women

Leonard可以任意選

and leonard could have his pick.

記住拉丁舞的技巧

remember the latin hips.

肩膀挺直 然后搖擺

Shoulders stay still,and... we sway.

一 二 三...

One,two,three... ...

五 六 七

five,six,seven.

Tishman女士一直盯著你呢

I think mrs. Tishman's got her eye on you.

我有過經(jīng)驗 你會喜歡的

I've been there. You're in for a treat.

"她說 你不了解我"

She said,"you don't know me"

"你甚至不在乎"

"you don't even care"

"哦 耶"

oh,yeah...

哦 上帝

oh,good lord.

"她說 你不了解我"

She said,"you don't know me"

"你不戴我送你的項鏈"

"you don't wear my chains"

"哦 耶" 天啊 這歌真棒

oh,yeah. God,that's a good song.

當然 如果這是你為雙重自殺混合錄制的CD

If you're compiling a mix cd for a double suicide.

我希望那"貓抓柱"是你自己用的

Oh,I hope that scratching post is for you.

我知道你在想什么 你的哮喘病我有考慮在內(nèi)

I know what you're thinking. I've taken your asthma into account.

圣地亞哥有個研究貓科的遺傳學家

There's a feline geneticist in san diego

培育了一種超可愛的低變應原小貓

who's developed the cutest little hypoallergenic calicos.

Leonard 聽我說...

Leonard,listen to me...

我在想給它起什么名字

I've been thinking about names.

在愛因斯坦 牛頓和毛靴中士之間猶豫

I'm kind of torn between einstein,newton and sergeant fuzzy boots.

Leonard 你真認為養(yǎng)一只轉基因貓

Leonard,do you really think you can satisfy your need

可以滿足你的感情需要嗎?

for a relationshh witip a genetically altered cat?

也許

Maybe.

一只讓人愛不釋手的可愛小貓

If it's a cute,little,cuddly cat.

得了吧 Leonard...

Oh,come on. Leonard...

這都是因為Penny吧

this is obviously about penny.

沒所謂

It doesn't matter.

她對我不感興趣 拒絕了我

The woman's not interested in me. The woman rejected me.

聽著 我認為你能跟Penny做愛的幾率

Okay,look,I think that you have as much of a chance of having a sexual relationship with penny

跟哈勃太空望遠鏡發(fā)現(xiàn)在每個黑洞中央

as the hubble telescope does of discovering at the center of every black hole is a little man

都有個小人在用閃光燈 尋找斷路器的幾率一樣大

with a flashlight searching for a circuit breaker.

盡管如此

Nevertheless,

我還是有責任向你指出 她并沒有拒絕你

I do feel obligated to point out to you that she did not reject you.

你從沒邀請她去約會

You did not ask her out.

你說的對

You're right.

我沒請她約會過 我該去請她約會

I didn't ask her out. I should ask her out.

不不不 重點不是這個

No,no,now that was not my point.

重點是 不要養(yǎng)貓

My point was don't buy a cat.

不 你是對的

No,but you're right.

我該過去請她約會

I should march over there and ask her out.

天 我們要養(yǎng)貓了

Oh,goody,we're getting a cat.

啊...不

Uh... no.

你好 Leonard

Oh,hey,leonard.

下午好 Penny 嗨 你好

Good afternoon,penny. So,hi... hey.

呃...

Uh...

你約了人吃飯嗎?

I was wondering if you had plans for dinner.

今晚的飯?

Uh,you mean dinner tonight?

"飯"這個詞本身就意思含糊

There is an inherent ambiguity in the word "dinner.

嚴格說來它所指的是一日的主餐 可以是午餐或晚餐

" Technically it refers to the largest meal of the day whenever it's consumed.

為了說清楚 我指的是晚飯

So to clarify here,by dinner I mean supper.

- 晚飯? - 就是吃飯啦

- Supper? - Or dinner.

如果你有空 6點半行嗎? 或者其他你方便的時間

I was thinking 6:30 if you can go. Or a different time.

6點半可以啊

Uh,6:30's great.

真的?

Really?

太好了

Great.

我喜歡跟你們一起玩

Yeah,I like hanging out with you guys.

我們?

Us guys?

對 Sheldon Howard Raj 他們都一起吧?

Yeah,you know,sheldon,howard,raj. Who all's coming?

他們...可能都會去吧

They... might all be there.

或者他們中的有些人可能去

Or a subset of them might be there.

從代數(shù)角度看 太多未知數(shù)了

Algebraically speaking,there are too many unknowns.

比如 Sheldon中午吃了Quizno三明治

For example,sheldon had quiznos for lunch.

有時他覺得吃那么飽 有時候不覺得

Sometimes he finds that filling,other times he doesn'T.

這不是店家的錯 他們的菜單很豐盛

It's no fault of quiznos- - they have a varied menu.

好吧 無所謂啦 聽起來挺有意思的

Okay,whatever. It sounds like fun.

很好 我們約時間了嗎?

Great. Did we say a time?

6點半

6:30.

- 你確定那時有空? - 對

- And that's still good for you? - It's fine.

- 不是刻在石板上非得那時去哦 - 6點半正好

- 'Cause it's not carved in stone. - No,6:30's great.

我去拿鑿子

I'll get my chisel.

為什么?

Why?

去刻在石...6點半見

To... carve the... I'll see you at 6:30.

我看起來如何?

How do I look?

你能說具體一點嗎?

Could you be more specific?

能看出來我在冒汗嗎?

Can you tell I'm perspiring a little?

不能

No.

你腋下深色的新月狀圖案 將其隱藏的很好

The dark crescent shaped patterns under your arms conceal it nicely.

你幾點約會?

What time is your date?

6點半

6:30.

太好了 那你還有2小時15分

Perfect. That gives you two hours and 15 minutes for

讓那片稠密的人造纖維分子云消散

that dense molecular cloud of aramis to dissipate.

汗很多嗎?

Is it too much?

如果你是橄欖球隊員就不算多

Not if you're a rugby team.

如果以后提到今晚的事 你沒來參加的原因是

By the way,if it should ever come up,you didn't join us

你在Quiznos吃雞肉三明治吃撐了

because you stuffed yourself with a chicken carbonara sub at quiznos.

我為什么要去參加?

Why would I join you?

不為什么

No reason.

你知道嗎 也許這樣做不好

Oh,you know what,maybe this isn't such a good idea.

不 酒精加上她一時糊涂

Oh,no,well,now there's always the possibility that alcohol and poor judgment

總有可能讓今晚成為浪漫之夜

on her part might lead to a nice romantic evening.

你說的對 酒 糊涂 今晚有可能會順利的

You're right. Alcohol,poor judgment- - it could go well.

當然還有另一種可能性

Of course there is the other possibility,

之后的6個月都會很難捱

that this date kicks off a rather unpleasant six months

倆人在走廊里尷尬的擦身而過

of the two of you passing awkwardly in the hall,

直到其中一人崩潰并搬到別的州去

until one of you breaks down and moves to another zip code.

你說到"可能會順利"就可以閉嘴了

You could've stopped at "it could go well.

"如果我能 我會的"

" If I could've,I would've.

我是絕種好男人

I mean,I'm a perfectly nice guy.

沒理由我們不能 在餐廳吃好頓晚餐

There's no reason we couldn't go to the restaurant,and have a lovely dinner,

飯后散散步 聊些共同話題

maybe take a walk afterwards,talk about things we have in common.

"你喜歡陶藝? 我超愛陶藝的!"

You love pottery? I love pottery!

然后暫停一下 我們都知道接下來要發(fā)生什么

There's a pause,we both know what's happening.

我傾身向前 我倆接吻

I lean in,we kiss.

開始時還有點猶豫 然后她開始回吻我

It's a little tentative at first,but then I realize she's kissing me back.

她在咬我的下唇! 她想要我!

She's biting my lower lip! She wants me!

這事能成!我們會做愛!

This thing is going the distance! We're going to have sex!

天 上帝啊!

Oh,god,oh,my god!

現(xiàn)在開始做愛了?

Is the sex starting now?

我恐慌癥發(fā)作了

I'm having a panic attack.

好吧 冷靜點

Oh,okay. Uh,well then... calm down.

如果我能冷靜 就不會恐慌了! 不然這怎么叫做恐慌癥發(fā)作!

If I could calm down,I wobe having a panic att... that's why they call it a panic attack.

好好 你坐下

All right,all right. Uh,s- s- sit down.

坐下 閉上眼

Yeah,sit down. Now close your eyes.

- 為什么? - 照做吧!

- Why? - Just do it.

好

Okay.

試著增加你α波的活性

Now try to increase your alpha wave activity.

什么? !

What? !

這是機能反饋療法

It's a biofeedback technique.

通過控制腦電波來放松

It's relaxation through brain wave manipulation.

我在美國神經(jīng)科學月刊上 看到一篇關于它的論文

I read a paper about it in journal of american neuroscience.

它的理論來源不完備 但是我認為基本原理正確

It was a little sparsely sourced,but I think the basic science is valid.

我可能把它放在這了

I probably have it here somewher E.

我沒法赴這個約會

Who am I kidding? I can't go through with this.

你給她打電話取消吧

You need to call her and cancel.

- 我? - 對

- Me? - Yes.

- 我要跟她說什么? - 我不知道

- What should I tell her? - I don't know.

- 跟她說我病了 - 好

- Tell her I'm sick. - Okay.

別說那種會讓她想來照顧我的病

Not the kind of illness that will make her want to come over and take care of me,

也不要嚴重得讓她 以后不愿跟我約會的病

but nothing so critical that she'll feel uncomfortable going out with me in the future

如果我以后還想嘗試的話

if I want to try this again.

了解

Got it.

那不能說花柳病啦?

So I'm assuming nothing venereal?

就跟她說你做了例行腸鏡檢查 還沒恢復吧

I'll just tell her that you had a routine conoloscopy and haven't quite bounced back.

給我電話

Give me the phone.

你不是想取消約會嗎?

I thought you wanted to cancel.

不行 如果我不出現(xiàn) 她還是會認為你會去的

I can't,because if I don't show up she'll still be expecting you.

為什么她認為我會去?

Why would she be expecting me?

別問了 我要再去洗個澡

Stop asking me all these questions. I need to take another shower.

其他的人直接來這找我們?

So are the rest of the guys meeting us here?

對...不對

Oh,yeah... no.

Raj跟Howard要工作 Sheldon...

It turns out that raj and howard had to work,and sheldon...

做了腸鏡 還沒恢復過來

had a colonoscopy and he hasn't quite bounced back yet.

我叔叔也做了腸鏡

Oh,my uncle just had a colonoscopy.

這就是我們倆的共同之處了

You're kidding. Then that's something we have in common.

怎么說?

How?

我們都認識...

We both have people in our lives who...

想將腸道息肉扼殺于搖籃當中的人

want to nip intestinal polyps in the bud.

物理界有啥新聞不?

so what's new in the world of physics?

沒有

Nothing.

真的? 一點都沒有?

Really? Nothing?

除了弦理論 自1930年后就沒什么發(fā)現(xiàn)了

Well,with the exception of string theory,not much has happened since the 1930s.

而弦理論也尚未證明

And you can't prove string theory.

最多就能說

At best you can say,"hey,look,

"嘿 我的理論內(nèi)部邏輯很連貫"

my idea has an internal logical consistency.

啊

" Ah.

我相信情況會好轉的

Well,I'm sure things will pick up.

芝士蛋糕工廠那邊有什么新消息?

What's new at the cheesecake factory?

沒有什么

Oh,uh,not much.

有個巧克力檸檬派賣得很好

We do have a chocolate key lime that's moving pretty well.

很好

Good. Good.

那你那個...

What about your,uh...

過道上的朋友怎樣?

hallway friend?

Doug? 我不知道

Doug? Oh,yeah,I don't know.

他人挺好也很風趣 但是...

I mean,you know,he's nice and funny,but...

準備開始點飲品了嗎?

can I get you started with some drinks?

不!

No!

- 你剛剛說到? 但是... - 我想喝點東西

- You were saying? But... - I'd like a drink.

先說完關于Doug的"但是" 我會把她叫回來

Just say the "but" thing about doug and then I'll get her back.

我不知道 是我的問題

Okay,well,I don't know,it's just me.

我還沒從跟Kurt的分手中完全恢復

I'm still getting over this breakup with kurt

跟Doug在一起是為了復健性愛

and this thing with doug would stju be rebound sex.

噢 提起復健性愛啊...

Oh,don't get me started on rebound sex.

我總是這樣

It's just... it's my pattern.

分手后找個帥哥

I break up,then I find some cute guy,

然后就是36小時毫無意義的...

and then it's just 36 meaningless hours of...

你知道

you know.

我不確定我知道

I'm not sure that I do.

是連續(xù)36個小時

is that one 36-hour experience,

還是一個輝煌夏季中...

or is that 36 hours spread out over,say...

分散的36個小時?

one glorious summer?

不 大概是一個周末吧

No,it's usually over a weekend,

相信我 那之后感覺很不好

and trust me,you do not feel good after it.

呃 皮膚疼痛是吧?

Well,chafing,right?

心情不好

Emotionally.

沒錯 心里疼痛

Of course,yeah,emotional chafing.

你想看些有趣的玩意嗎?

Hey,do you want to see something cool?

我不用手碰 就能把這顆橄欖弄進杯子里

I can make this olive go into this glass without touching it.

- 怎么弄啊? - 物理原理

- How? - Physics.

哇 離心力

Wow,centrifugal force.

實際上 是向心力

Actually,it's centripetal force,

玻璃對橄欖作用產(chǎn)生的內(nèi)向力

which is an inward force generated by the glass acting on the olive...

抱歉

Excuse me.

如果你坐在那顆橄欖上

If you were riding on the olive,

你就是一個非慣性參照系 并會...

you'd be in a non - inertial reference frame and would...

你沒事吧?

are you okay?

沒事

Yeah,I'm okay.

你打翻花生醬了嗎?

Did you spill ketchup?

- 沒 - 那有事了

- No. - I'm not okay.

你確定不用去急診室?

Are you sure you don't want to go to the emergency room?

我沒事 不流血了

No,no,I'm okay. It stopped bleeding.

但你吐了啊 那不是腦震蕩的癥狀嗎?

I know,but you did throw up. Isn't that a sign of a concussion?

對 但我也暈車 所以...

Yes. But I get car sick,too,so...

好吧

okay.

還有 抱歉弄臟你的車

Sorry about your car,by the way.

沒關系 大部分你都吐車外了

Oh,no,it's fine. You got most of it out the window.

那個騎自行車的可憐人

The poor guy on the bike.

我今晚過得很愉快

Well,I had a nice time.

我也是

Yeah,me,too.

那晚安啦

Well,um,good night.

晚安

Good night.

- Leonard? - 啊?

- Leonard? - Ahye?

今晚這是約會嗎?

Was this supposed to be a date?

今晚?

This?

不是

No.

當然不是

No,of course not.

只是你跟我還有一幫

This was just you and me hanging out with a bunch of guys

因工作和腸鏡而沒有出現(xiàn)的人的聚會

who didn't show up 'cause of work and a colonoscopy.

好 我只是問問

Okay,I was just checking.

如果我跟女孩約會 我確實跟女孩約會

When I take a girl on a date- - and I do- -

那個女孩會知道她是在約會的

she knows she's been dated.

大寫D

Capital D.

粗體黑字 下劃線

boldface. Undeinrled.

約 會

Da... ted.

我可能腦震蕩了 我去躺躺

I think I might have a little concussion. I'm gonna go lie down.

晚安

Good night.

約會如何?

So,how was your date?

贊!

Awesome!

憑酒跟糊涂得一分

Score one for liquor and poor judgment.

（圖片來源網(wǎng)絡侵刪）